Recently I fell from the good graces of a beautiful woman who I had been courting for past four years. For when she said last Monday, “I have been observing you following me around for the past two days. What do you want ? If you do not have a valid reason for doing so than let me assure that my father knows how to play psychological games and break down people like you in a matter of seconds. He wrote the dialogues for Mukesh Harane anti-smoking ad.” I was very much hurt and scared by this direct confrontation so I coolly tried to mention that I was trying to sell a second hand Scooty to her. She mumbled something along the line that I certainly was the creepy salesman stereotype personified but I do not look like someone who would have the ownership of a second hand vehicle. I said that the lady speaks the truth and I was a broker. She said: “Broker? More like broke er ?” She laughed and threw her hair (brown color,sparkles and scents and what-not) back and went off. I was heart broken and realized that my knee had taken the most toll and had started throbbing violently. It was damaged by this trauma of love and needed medical attention immediately.
I have absolutely no idea what they are talking about. They sound like my cousin on the day when he was singing hit Jeetendra songs whole day long and then accidentally touched a live wire and his tongue spouted gibberish for 10 minutes because of shock. May be they are not talking and are just making random guttural sounds as if going back to the primal roots of mankind in search of a more evolved language which does not have a pitfall of nuances. what did he mean by that tilt of head ? Is it a yes ? Is his neck stiff ? Is he confirming that NATO is bombing for peace again ? I am not good with nuances but my thoughts are on a roll today, deep and lucid as opposed to the communication level of these freaks. I remember when I admonished my Kannada room mate for saying that his native language sounds like they are practicing failure in singing since childhood. I have absolutely no patience for people disrespecting their culture and mother tongue. I will spit on their faces if they even question it. Stupid ************. Why are both men dressed in gowns.
This was my extended monologue in the operation theater that was part of the evidence produced in the court by my insurance company and two anesthesiologists who operated on me. I was being sued for not ticking the miscellaneous disease column in my medical insurance form. I do not know whether the whole “emotional turmoil of love” theory holds any water but when it comes to physical damages done by love, you can literally see the wounds. Only the stink of wound is not there.