Date 22nd April’14, time 11:52 pm now, I feel something very constructive deep inside. I feel a fire, a fire that will take away all my discomforts, pains. Now, what kind of pain am I referring to? I am just 21. What is this pain about? To some it seems my hopelessness, my anguish of not achieving something great worthy so far….Now ‘Great-worthy’ is a big term in itself. Isn’t it? What kind of achievement am I talking about? Well anything, anything that is not in my possession and makes me this pallid. The very word ‘possession’ makes me travel back in time. A pretty average girl, average academics (though they seemed decent to me), class monitor from 1st class to 12th, Vice-Captain and then headgirl, 12th topper, college topper. I am not here to boast about my achievements, trust me they ain’t achievements!!! They are just a futile covering over all my brutal scars…Scars of not being in a great college, scars of not being able to stand by their expectations, scars..well I can continue on this, and the stuff would never end. But this is not the reason why I chose to write. Today, is a new beginning. The one I crave for. It’s time I Get Off The Scale! That’s it. From now no excuses, no explanations, no regrets. Tomorrow, I will awake with a fresh sense of inspiration. I will break through the barriers of the past. It’s time to free myself from the personal imprisonment, time to break free. I can no longer sit back with a victim mentality, I choose to take charge of my life.
Addicted to life now. I never did before, you know.
“I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.” ― Frank Herbert, Dune
A journey towards a dream, an Incredible change!