My own creation when I was in a lighter mood.
All those who got calls, dont read this. You may not enjoy it.
Obviously this must be read in a lighter vein.
Chat between two serious CAT aspirants and the elusive CAT/IIMs
Student 1 : Dear Sir. I have got 99.33, 99.72 in 2 sections and a 99.84 overall, but only 95.32 in the other section
. Can i get a call, Dear
CAT, from IIMA.
CAT/IIMA : What????, IIMA Call?. Dont you see you are not competent enough to cope up with the rigorous 2 year course we conduct here. Had you scored 0.02 %ile more you could have proved yourself to be competent enough to pursure a course and joined the ranks of MS Banga and Harsha Bogle. With a poor 95.32%ile in one section, All i can tell you is plz study more.
Student 1 : Sir, How about the chances from IIMB.
CAT/IIMB : Ha ha ha ha ha.. IIMB.. ha ha ha.. (Gearing up itself somehow to answer the question).. Fine.. I will anyway try to answer your question.. I need a few more details to answer your question anyway.. like..
1) What is your Date of Birth. It must fall between May 14th and Dec22nd. Else doubtful. Lets see. There are some rare cases who get thru with some lineancy in that. Anyway. Best of Luck on that.
2) 10th scores and the State you did it from and also, whether you have scored more than 83.11 % in that
3) 12th scores and the State you did it from and also, whether you have scored more than 86.76 % in that
4) Work-ex. Just the number of months would do fine. You need not tell whether you did it Microsoft, Google or Kandasamy mudaliar Textile mill at chittoor.. It does not matter much. We need diversity, you know. We also dont like differentiating between people based on illogical data like this.
5)
CAT %ile. Now, wait. This is thr trickiest part. We are still awaiting the results from Las Vegas Casinos were our profs are playing. They are yet to finish the game. Prof X (who has a bet on keeping VA cut-off at 88.32%ile) is losing badly. He needs to improve on his casino skills. Prof Y is winning the game. He had pegged it at 96.32%ile. lets see.. Last year Prof Z won hands down with a 85%ile in DI. A few bugging students sneaked into our institute thru that. Lets see how many more get lucky this year. But lemme say guys, Its fun. Casinos are fun. The above rules are very well applicable for other IIMs too, though some lineancy maybe allowed.
Student 1: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Somehow composing himself to ask the next question)
Student 1: But Sir, almost none of these can be changed by me now. I dont have any control over it at this stage of my life.
CAT : Obviously. You cant change. And thats what we love the most. You have absolutely no control over your destiny. We control it. You heard it right? Anyway.. We do have a backdoor entry. If you score 99.95+ in all three sections and a 99.98+ overall, you may be exempted from all this. But again, its a "maybe". So please dont have high hopes. Lets see.
Student 2: Sir, I have scored 99.81 overall and a 99.96 in quants, 99.14 in verbal but a 78.17 in DI coz of a bad day. I have received no calls from none of the IIMs till now. But I have good work-ex, can very well think logically and am suited to do an MBA from the top IIMs. I can obviously handle the rigour.
CAT : ROTFL.. My God! a 78.17 in DI.. Do these profs release these types of below average percentiles too
. Yuck! I never knew anyone can get a 78.17 in DI. pretty surprising. And were you talking about calls from the IIMs. First you need to explain to them what a 78.17 means.
Student 2: But sir a 99.96 in quants and a 99.81 overall and a 99.14 in VA. Does that not look attractive enough to study at IIMs ABCLI?
CAT : Sorry.. I could not hear properly.. What did you tell your score was in DI?
Student 2 (losing his cool
): WTF. WTF do you want to know. I got a f'in 78.17 in DI and finally all you buggers decided I am incompetent to think logically. You decide that since I could not crack one more set in DI, I am not fit for management. Blah Blah Blah..
.................. p://www.pagalguy.com/forum/" target="_blank">CAT (gets a phone call) : Are Bhatta bhai. kahan hai tu.. Still playing at the casinos? You guys have real fun time.. So who won the game and whats the cut-off for QA this year.. What.. 89.11 ile huh.. Who won the game.. Ok.. Visit the miami beach.. (and he walks off speaking)
Cheers,
Pradeep
....sure he/she will b sooooooooooo embarrassed.
Linear Mode
