I wanna say something in here to all the Gals...:D

We all work equally hard as compared to guys..many of us have achieved the gr88 dreams of entering IIMs...becoming a successful business woman...supporting our families...Dowry,female infanticide are not really seen now in the urban areas....thn why do you think Our is a Male Dominated Society...why not an Equal one...!!

Because we put ourselves Physically weaker...GO OUT AND LEARN SOME SELF DEFENSE!! Get sporty n athletic...Stop acting like the Cinderella who cant rescue herself and needs a Prince Charming to save her...
Its all the goddamn effect of media...n television tht portrays women as weak...Women can be strong and feminine at the same time...
I know most of us...evn if have thought bout sumthing like Martial Arts...sometimes people give you a wierd luk saying.." Oh comeon...you gonna join Martial Arts...are you out of your mind...Go study...or do something constructive...!!" but tht very instant ppl dont think bout issues like eve teasing...

Dont sit and cry over the physical weakness of female in Animal Kingdom...What you believe you can manifest....

Gewd Luck:D

Any community service opportunities available in Delhi..im very interested in the same but dont have much idea...The Blanknoise project seems quite interesting too..

What you must know about sexual harassment

See Everything has good and bad sides .. Like if a stupid drunkard did something wrong on Mumbai trains, what's the point of repeating it
ad-nauseam and ignoring the other incidents whereby guys have stood for the rights of gals .. Like - for every 1 case of harrassment you show me, i can show you atleast one case where men have stood up for the right of ladies .. So my point is - Why keep on harping abt the bad ?? In ur Blank noise project, do you gals ever honour men who have done good things for women - say stopped harrassment or prevented any ugly incidents ?? Well, i maybe wrong here, but havent seen any positive campaign so far - the guys are always depicted as the one waiting to pounce on a gal !! Why such a stereo type ?

I have been reading this thread for quite some time and I precisely agree with the point raised that nothing positive has been said about guys/gentlemen who have stood for preventing such incidents or have helped a woman/girl in a nasty situation. Rather this thread is just harping on the misgivings of men and how they spare no effort in torturing women when given a chance.
Like you fellows put so much effort in finding out such dastardly acts of men oppressing /sexually humiliating women, don't you all BNP members (collectively) think that you should spare even 10-20% of the effort in finding men who have helped women in their hour of need? What I feel is that since such a stance has been put up in this thread and that too so vociferously (members teaming with each other and expressing a huge number of "groans" on others who don't share their view) people like PUPIL (no offence meant) have adopted a diametrically opposite stance and keep on harping about meanness in women. I am in no way endorsing Pupil's views or am in no way a male chauvinist but I need to drive home the point that "all men are NOT perverted and sexually frustrated dogs" that is being portrayed so rampantly on this thread. Why this thread? There is another thread started in B-School Students Discussions area that talks about the bad treatment/sexual harassment meted out to females in IIMs and other institutes of repute. Why is this general consensus against males being built up friends? Do you genuinely believe that there is not a single good natured and a decent male left on this planet? If yes, then you are surely a female chauvinist.
As a human being with a good upbringing, I would never hesitate to help out a woman when in need and I am sure that any guy who has a good moral upbringing in a family with strong ethics would do the same. Mind all that "good upbringing" according to me has nothing to do with financial condition of the family or the number of members in a family (I mean that rich or poor does not matter here- anyone out of both could/could not have a good upbringing). What I intend to portray is that if a person is taught to respect women from the very beginning of his life by his elders (in a way that they set examples) then the problem can be nipped in the bud TO A GREAT EXTENT, but if he sees no respect for women from a young age (his formational years), then it becomes difficult to "teach" that to him since certain fixed ideas of women being talked about, viewed about and thought about as "objects" may already have made home in his mind in his formational years itself ! Has the discussion on this thread ever pondered about these points? NO.all that is being done is blatant male bashing in the name of BlankNoise Project.
Rather why can't we collectively highlight situations wherein men have gone out of the way to help women? Why can't we collectively work out visits to schools/colleges and educate today's youth (after all they are our brethren) on this vexatious issue. Why can't we form a vociferous mass movement for the cause using all possible media platforms and highlight the mental state of the evil-doers and the victim by organizing street plays against this issue and by conducting camps for young girls/women and showing them ways to read body language/expressions/self defense on a bigger scale (like something that Baba Ramdev has done for popularizing "yoga")?
It is an old Chinese saying that it is better to light a candle than to curse the darkness and all we are doing now is cursing the darkness (read male-bashing and thinking that all males are out there to rape women). I am really sorry to say that rather than coming out in huge numbers against the issue, what we are doing is trying to find a consensus among ourselves and argue against people who don't agree with us. This is clearly NOT what needs to be done.
We need to channelize our energies not at each other but to the outer world and do it in such a way that it makes a difference.if not now, then maybe 20 years later but the effort has to be consistent. Remember, if not today, then tomorrow we also will have daughters/sons and we wouldn't want them to be at the receiving end. For that, we have to build a foundation of inculcating in young minds the respect for women (I in no way intend to flatter women by saying this but I strongly believe that children are like wet clay, they can be moulded to any line of thought in their formational years. I do not intend to do moral policing mind all please!) and earning their own respect in society.
If the forum members come forward, then I am ready to commit myself for such a cause and I have many such ideas which may make a difference but mere ranting about the sorry state is going to do no good. Action is what is needed. And all the more, decisive action is what is needed. Its time to stop commenting and start DOING. Let us do something to stop this menace my friends
Hope you get the gist of what I mean to say guys!
Regards,
Tumtum.

In reply to your question about why its important to harp about the bad, I'd like to say that it seems to be a very effective way of making people aware that they are being talked about, that their dirty acts are being noted and discussed, not ignored and overlooked as they imagine. Action can begin, but only with awareness. If every person in the country knows that every time they harass someone, their actions are being noted, criticised, and made public mockery of, I believe that very few people would ever dare to harass another human being. But it may not be right to say that the good behaviour of any person towards another is being ignored. Every time someone speaks up for an oppressed person, it is noted and applauded. Every time someone sympathizes with an abused person, it is noted and appreciated. Every time someone speaks up or acts against harassment, it is noted and awarded. Good behaviour may be its own reward, but if no one comes forward to denounce and criticise bad behaviour, it will only continue unabated.

However, it is just as important to recognise and discuss how people have helped each other fight harassment as well. Thank you for pointing that out to us.

Ok .. Atleast some one who admits that the system is not perfect .. That's good !!

"Wrong. Bad things do happen, and more so today than say ten years ago. The reason? The reason for that is simple - population explosion. "

Good point !! But still there's something called percentages .. Like u can always see how many percentage women suffer then and now !! And u can draw your own conclusions whether education has helped in this cause or has harmed it !!

"Some just roll with the punches and take the good with the bad. That is what real moderation is." -

Good point again .. See Everything has good and bad sides .. Like if a stupid drunkard did something wrong on Mumbai trains, what's the point of repeating it
ad-nauseam and ignoring the other incidents whereby guys have stood for the rights of gals .. Like - for every 1 case of harrassment you show me, i can show you atleast one case where men have stood up for the right of ladies .. So my point is - Why keep on harping abt the bad ?? In ur Blank noise project, do you gals ever honour men who have done good things for women - say stopped harrassment or prevented any ugly incidents ?? Well, i maybe wrong here, but havent seen any positive campaign so far - the guys are always depicted as the one waiting to pounce on a gal !! Why such a stereo type ??

"You say that women should not create so much hype about sexual harassment, to avoid antagonising the men. So what alternative do you propose? "

I am sorry, but dont have a solution for this .. All i can say is this - Things are improving and things will improve .. With more education, more exposure and good family values, guys do and will behave properly !!

"How many of us can truly call ourselves moderates, no matter if we're men or women?" -

That's the subject of another big loong debate !!! Human beings (guys and gals) do have an animal instinct and a destructive streak in them !! And i guess due to circumstances sometimes the unpleasent side shows out !! But "proper"Education and "proper" moral values will make sure that bad things doesnt happen !! (Note the stress on proper)

-Karthik-

An incident - a single eve teasing, harrassment or something of that like can seriously scar a gal's mind and can cause tremendous damage .. But at the same time, i do certainly feel that some of the things which are taking place under this banner of "Fight against sexual harrassment" are a bit overboard !!

I agree with you. Atleast on the above quoted lines. Sometimes, things do go overboard, and people are targeted unnecessarily. I say "people" here because sometimes even women are targeted by feminist groups for having uttered or done something that is offensive to these people. I don't need to give any examples for that, we all know what happens every time a fashion show is conducted in a city or AIDS propoganda is taken to the masses. And feminist groups are right at the front of that pack.

Things have changed, most people are educated and more often than not, wrong things wont happen !! Why create so much hype and un neccasarily antagonise even the "moderates" among men !!!

Wrong. Bad things do happen, and more so today than say ten years ago. The reason? Some may say its because of all the wicked things shown on TV these days, some may say its because more women are allowed to roam the streets indecently these days, some may say its because men don't respect women as much as they used to in the yesteryears. More people are educated, yes, but then there are a greater number of uneducated people too. The reason for that is simple - population explosion.

Women asked to be treated as equals to men, and sometimes, don't want the responsibilities that go along with it. No more separate cordoned-off sections in buses for women anymore. Some women don't like it because they get jostled around just as much as everyone else in the bus because of this. But some don't like it because they get fondled and petted and deliberately harassed more. Some just roll with the punches and take the good with the bad. That is what real moderation is.

You say that women should not create so much hype about sexual harassment, to avoid antagonising the men. So what alternative do you propose? That women go back to being silent wallflowers, afraid to speak out, afraid to reach out to other women in need of help? And these so called "moderates", are they really so conservative that they can't separate the wheat from the chaff and recognise the real problems rather than drown in all the unnecessary hype? How many of us can truly call ourselves moderates, no matter if we're men or women?

Your thoughts are not thought-provoking in the least. They are indeed offensive, argumentative, ineffective and useless. Unless you have something relevant to add to the discussion, or have a relevant topic that needs to be discussed, please stop taking your frustration out on this thread and corrupting it. I believe I speak for a lot of people on this forum when I say this, and please stop spamming just to please YOUR ego.

Pupil, this is the wrong thread for the post above.

@coolcataspirant: You have made a mistake by going against women in this forum. Now see how many groans you receive. Of course, when I say this, women will not do that.


It is very clear that these women are only trying to create a anti-male environment in the country and constantly babbling that they(women) will always remain victim, innocent and weak.

Feminists are creating anti-male environment in the society
Feminists have successfully created an environment where most women tend to hate men in every respect.
http://www.australian-news.net/gender_bias.htm

Anti-male sentiments on the rise
When good men are silently tolerating all the injustice, then these feminists are bound to win in their ambition.
http://www.boloji.com/opinion/0071.htm

Because of Feminists, more boys are dropping out of school/college and their academic performance is deteriorating
When mens education is excessively ignored to encourage women, men will obviously feel alienated. And these feminists are giving reasons to girls to rejoice by giving publicity to boys poor academic performance.
http://headlines.agapepress.org/archive/11/252002d.asp

This is exactly what is happening in India. Think about it. Men are forced in live in 18th century where they are legally obligated to respect the so-called dignity(?) of a woman, and women can live in 21st century shedding all her cultral inhibitions and also continue to extract ridiculous legal powers (not rights). Their deception is very clear and obvious.

Hmm .. The whole thing's very intresting !! While i can understand some things which pupil says, he also needs to look at the other side of the fence... An incident - a single eve teasing, harrassment or something of that like can seriously scar a gal's mind and can cause tremendous damage .. But at the same time, i do certainly feel that some of the things which are taking place under this banner of "Fight against sexual harrassment" are a bit overboard !! For instance - there are pictures of some 5 people in the blank noise blog who are alleged to be "stalkers" or something !! No proof or anything is given - for all u know they maybe looking at the wine shop or a lewd picture on a poster !! It's more of a fear pyschosis - sometimes gals can become un necessarily too cautious !! For instance - anyone who has travelled on a crowded bus will know that everyone gets pushed around, stomped and trampled regardless of age, gender or sex .. And if anything, most guys push against each other more for the fear of accidently falling on the gal standing nearby.. I do agree that there are "bad" characters - but this sort of constant media barrage will more often create "monsters" in the minds of ladies and every guy is looked at as a potential harraser - which is wrong !!

Like they say - every guy is neither Lord Ram nor a potential rapist !! Dont blindly trust nor blindly suspect anyone .. Things have changed, most people are educated and more often than not, wrong things wont happen !! Why create so much hype and un neccasarily antagonise even the "moderates" among men !!!

@ pupil
My Nation India-That's the thread you started. Well, there are so many issues in India which needs to be discussed- Poverty, illeteracy corruption, reservation..... and many more..

Show me where have I written that nobody except me can post an article of National interest in "My Nation -India". If you have certain National issues in mind, you are free to write. Why would you think I will stop you?

When I read that thread for the first time, i was glad that there is something you think about besides women. But i was wrong. After starting four threads discussing your dirty thoughts about women, you dragged women even in that thread.
And now this thread, whose purpose is to help girls against harassement, you are bringing in your bitterness in this thread too..

You are wrong, of course as always, and I appreciate you confessed it. I am not thinking all the time about women because it would be more satisfying to think about the beautiful mother nature instead of a woman.

You seem to have some learning disability. You can't even differentiate between an issue of national interest and dirty thoughts about women. Dirty thoughts about women is talking about women's physical features in bad taste.

Yes, truth is bitter. By the way, what do you have to say about the new proposal of sexual harassment at workplace bill? Do you call that dirty thoughts about women? How lame!!!What a shame that you don't want others to know the truth!!!

I am very happy with myself because i have no hatred and prejudice in my mind. Although i have strong arguements against your childish post (as usual), but arguing with you is below my standard. Arguements are done with mentally stable people. Not with mentally sick person like you. Go and visit a psychiatrist. I have my full sympathy with you. .

Of course you have to be happy since nobody is going through the pains to explain to you how mentally unhealthy you really are. Since I am exposing the truth, I agree you will have no arguments against my views. Mentally sick!! Look whos talking!!! I don't need sympathy from a person who has been living on other's sympathy.

@ Deepti-Thank you. You really gave very good and mature points against his post.

Very good and mature points????? Wow, you do know what you are talking about. hahahahahaha. Deepti must be flattered with your comments.

Now cut the chase. Let others discuss the issue I have brought up, which is not unrelated to this topic of this thread.

@ pupil
My Nation India-That's the thread you started. Well, there are so many issues in India which needs to be discussed- Poverty, illeteracy corruption, reservation..... and many more.

When I read that thread for the first time, i was glad that there is something you think about besides women. But i was wrong. After starting four threads discussing your dirty thoughts about women, you dragged women even in that thread.

And now this thread, whose purpose is to help girls against harassement, you are bringing in your bitterness in this thread too.

Are you a male-hating feminist or what? How do you live with yourself?

I am very happy with myself because i have no hatred and prejudice in my mind. Although i have strong arguements against your childish post (as usual), but arguing with you is below my standard. Arguements are done with mentally stable people. Not with mentally sick person like you. Go and visit a psychiatrist. I have my full sympathy with you.

@ Deepti-Thank you. You really gave very good and mature points against his post.

D e e p t i Says

Lets get back to the topic of the thread people. Sorry for further distracting the thread in an attempt to bring it back from distraction.

Oh, okay. So you want to talk on the topic of this thread. Fine, lets talk.

WomenConnect, an NGO in Delhi, has proposed a new Sexual Harassment at Workplace Bill in the Parliament, which says that if a woman is found to have filed a "False" case of sexual harassment on somebody, she should "not" be prosecuted.

They also proposed that the complaint of the woman should be, by default, considered true and genuine and in case she is unable to provide any evidence, the accused should be considered guilty until proven innocent.


Now I don't want to listen to any of your statistics, data, or whatever. Just answer me, could you give a guarantee on behalf of all the women in the country that not a single woman in the country will misuse this provision. I want the guarantee and all members of PG wants this guarantee from you. Since you assume that not a single woman is bad in the country, maybe it is easier for you to say that, "Yes, this provision will never ever be misused." Say it. If you say it could be misused, then everybody will know that this particular provision is the reason for misuse. And it will also prove that given a provision such as this to women, women will not hesitate to misuse it. Think and say.

They are proposing that even if the case filed is false, still the woman should go scot-free and she can demand others to respect her so-called extinct dignity. Do you consider that the accused being considered guilty until proven innocent is not a violation of his fundamental rights? It is violation or it is not?

No, I am not saying that there should be no protection for women. But there is a question that if men too are protected under sexual harassment at workplace law in foreign countries, then why there is fear in women if somebody proposes to include men too in protection under sexual harassment? It is understandable that since you are convinced that each and every woman is good, you would not want a law that protecta men. But then if you know that all women are good, then it shouldn't be a problem to include protection for men too. The fear in them itself proves something dubious inside them.

Women Rights issue is going overboard now and everbody are witnessing it but are not so charged up to oppose it. The time is not far away when more and more men will oppose and then we all will see the battle of the sexes. As of now, only women are attacking men, men are mere taking the blows in their stride.

Pupil Says

I didn't get you. I know what is "being childish", but I don't know what is being "too" childish. What do you mean by that? Forget it, don't pressurize your mind more. You keep the answer to yourself and be happy.

"too childish" means "very childish" - might not be gramatically correct but commonly used.

I dont have the patience/time to respond to your "very childish" post. My mistake to even try to get you into a d'cussion mode - even after seeing so many attempts from other puys.

Lets get back to the topic of the thread people. Sorry for further distracting the thread in an attempt to bring it back from distraction.

hareshmandani Says

Don't you think you are being too childish ?

I didn't get you. I know what is "being childish", but I don't know what is being "too" childish. What do you mean by that? Forget it, don't pressurize your mind more. You keep the answer to yourself and be happy.

... "There was five man and one women present in that conpartment." Could he not say that there were six humans?...

...Apparently, in our society, only women are humans, men have no right to complain for anything, and if he does, he is rebuked. ...

...Just because my opinion is troubling your ego that doesn't mean that I should stop writing for those who are finding my posts thought-provoking. Yes, I agree with you, truth is bitter...

Don't you think you are being too childish ? I saw that you've 'groan'ed many of last posts. Why?

D e e p t i Says

Pupil, why are you turning each thread into a for-men / against-feminism thing? Whatever my nation and Blank noise threads have to do with - for-men/against-feminism.

Thank you so much for understanding that I am not anti-woman.

First off, at times like accident, it is about humans helping humans - we belong to the same species - remember?

I didn't see this line coming from you when erudite categorically mentioned giving gyan to PG members that "There was five man and one women present in that conpartment." Could he not say that there were six humans? I have been reading posts of members criticizing males for not being proactive when they see a woman in trouble. Could they not say humans instead of male? And when I exposed the reality, you come running to me trying to cover up the truth.

What do you do if people are injured? drive them to hospitals? You are forgetting to take into account a few statistics here. What is the % of women who know driving? What is the % of women that have the physical built to lift a man/woman lying on the road and carry them? What is the % of women that are out there on the road - traveling to work/shop?

I am not worried about the so-called %. I am only concerned with the moral duty, as raised by knowledgeable erudite. Doesn't matter if the woman is unable to lift the body of the injured man/woman, but walking away from the scene as if nothing happened can't be justified for their lack of physical strength. If you go to a 'human' who is injured in an accident, nobody would stop you to speak up or give some suggestions to help the injured. Whatever % related arugments you have put are all baseless and shows your attempt to divert the issue.

So, what is your point? since % of women helping injured is less than % of men helping injured - you should not speak up for any woman?

I am definitely not saying that. But you'll are definitely "implying" that when a woman is in trouble, then nobody, including men and women, should speak up for any man. Are you trying to take away freedom of speech from me and, apparently, from others? It is my constitutional rights. The moment one person speaks in favour of men, you'll attack that person talking about women issues blah blah to discourage that person to support men. And some would also call that person male-chauvinist pig. What for? For supporting men? You can't deny that because you too have done that. You only said, we all are humans. Apparently, in our society, only women are humans, men have no right to complain for anything, and if he does, he is rebuked.

Pupil, no one has anything against your points - so long as you keep them to yourself or d'cuss about them in relavent threads. Every one has a right to understand, learn and grow at their own pace. Please do not enforce your opinions on to people. Threatening, offending, being sarcastic, being rude and attacking people - are a sureshot way to help people not listen - they overshadow your points in most of your posts.

Just because my opinion is troubling your ego that doesn't mean that I should stop writing for those who are finding my posts thought-provoking. Yes, I agree with you, truth is bitter.

Pupil, why are you turning each thread into a for-men / against-feminism thing? Whatever my nation and Blank noise threads have to do with - for-men/against-feminism.

Alright. When you are walking on the busy street, and you see a man or a woman being banged by a speeding car, who will come forward to help him/her? 99% of them are men who put aside their important work/meetings and try to help out the injured person. Have you seen a woman unrelated to the injured person helping in a situation like this?

First off, at times like accident, it is about humans helping humans - we belong to the same species - remember?

If you still want to see this thru your male-female glasses, here goes. What do you do if people are injured? drive them to hospitals? You are forgetting to take into account a few statistics here. What is the % of women who know driving? What is the % of women that have the physical built to lift a man/woman lying on the road and carry them? What is the % of women that are out there on the road - traveling to work/shop?

Now don't give me that nonsense that men are unemployed and so they can afford to waste their time in such a situation.

Why do you expect non-sense from people in this forum? and if you do, why do you keep coming back?

Women will watch the drama around the accident and keep walking as if nothing happened. Even during Mumbai Blast, you will see only men coming forward to help and get the injured to the hospital. Did you see any woman helping out at the explosion site? Infact some women were seen complaining that men forced them to get out of the taxi/autorickshaw to get the injured to the hospital.

So, what is your point? since % of women helping injured is less than % of men helping injured - you should not speak up for any woman?

Don't talk about moral duty, understood?

Why is your tone threatening and offensive?

People like you are born only to corrupt the sanctity of socialism. Are you a male-hating feminist or what? How do you live with yourself?

There - personal attack, rudeness.

Pupil, no one has anything against your points - so long as you keep them to yourself or d'cuss about them in relavent threads. Every one has a right to understand, learn and grow at their own pace. Please do not enforce your opinions on to people. Threatening, offending, being sarcastic, being rude and attacking people - are a sureshot way to help people not listen - they overshadow your points in most of your posts.

Unfortunately, this whole world is not same as your place. Yes, there are good people like you and me, who will protect girls whenever we see them in trouble. But this is also a fact that many men are chicken and they hide back. I am not thinking negative, but incidences happening around us says so.
There are many people who help girls. But there is also no dearth of people who are submissive and place their security before their moral duty.

Moral duty????? That is what you just said?

Alright. When you are walking on the busy street, and you see a man or a woman being banged by a speeding car, who will come forward to help him/her? 99% of them are men who put aside their important work/meetings and try to help out the injured person. Have you seen a woman unrelated to the injured person helping in a situation like this? Now don't give me that nonsense that men are unemployed and so they can afford to waste their time in such a situation. Women will watch the drama around the accident and keep walking as if nothing happened. Even during Mumbai Blast, you will see only men coming forward to help and get the injured to the hospital. Did you see any woman helping out at the explosion site? Infact some women were seen complaining that men forced them to get out of the taxi/autorickshaw to get the injured to the hospital.

Don't talk about moral duty, understood?

Besides, if you are bringing up one incident of men not coming forward to help a woman/girl, there are hundreds, maybe thousands, of incidents where men have stepped-up and helped. People like you are born only to corrupt the sanctity of socialism. Are you a male-hating feminist or what? How do you live with yourself?

Sir, speak for yourself.

Ofcourse there are all kinds of people. But saying 'all' would be incorrect. If a girl asks for help, she does get helped; at least in the part of world I reside.

Unfortunately, this whole world is not same as your place. Yes, there are good people like you and me, who will protect girls whenever we see them in trouble. But this is also a fact that many men are chicken and they hide back. I am not thinking negative, but incidences happening around us says so.

Don't you remember the incidence that hit all the newspaper 4-5 years back. In a local train, a 12 year old mental girl was raped by a drunk man in bright daylight. There was five man and one women present in that conpartment, but none of them did anything! The girl was found crying on the station by the police and on medical examination, she was found to be raped.

There are many people who help girls. But there is also no dearth of people who are submissive and place their security before their moral duty.

You are right.Whenever a girl is publicly teased, all the people instead of supporting her, become dumb and enjoy the drama.

Sir, speak for yourself.

Ofcourse there are all kinds of people. But saying 'all' would be incorrect. If a girl asks for help, she does get helped; at least in the part of world I reside.

Being a resident of Chennai myself, when I read a report on this in an issue of The Deccan Chronicle the next day, I was shocked, furious, and ashamed of belonging to a city like this where there is this kind of "Police Raj". Where sexual harrasment of girls is so blatant, and that too by the very people who are supposed to be preventing it. Where people don't have the courage to raise their voices in the court of law against this kind of injustice, where only a single newspaper in the entire state dared to report the incident fully and completely.

What century are you'll people living in? Wait. I will tell you one incident.

I was waiting for my friend in a congested market area. A car was parked outside a shop on a no-parking area. The police officer came and waited for the owner to arrive. A woman came. He said that she is not supposed to park in a no-parking spot. Instead of apologising, she starting arguing with that police officer. When the police officer began aruging with her and ask her to show her licence, she threatened the cop saying that if he does not let her go, she will scream and tell the public that the cop tried to sexually molest her. The cop immediately backed-off. I was the eye-witness of that incident.

Don't shut your eyes when a woman complains. There is more that meets the eye. Newspaper are notorious for publishing one-sided story. And you'll are so educated but still you'll blindly believe them. What a shame!!!!!

aastha juneja Says

well i totally agreee....once one of my cousin was travelling alone and was harresed by a guy in a local bus...when she raised her voice some oldie uncle ask,ed her to sit quietly..which agitated her even more...but could she help it NO....what do u think, she could do..finally ,all she did was got up and sat next to an aunty but will she ever forget it no...and i think besides that dude that uncle was to be blamed even more..

You are right.Whenever a girl is publicly teased, all the people instead of supporting her, become dumb and enjoy the drama.
Once my friend was travelling alone in a bus and two boy sitting next to her were teasing her shamelessly in front of all the people.She yelled at them, but neither the conductor nor a single person in that crowded bus stand in her support.Are almost twenty person unable to fight two boys? All this incidences set fear in girls to raise their voice whenever they are teased.

I was shocked, furious, and ashamed of belonging to a city like this where there is this kind of "Police Raj". Where sexual harrasment of girls is so blatant, and that too by the very people who are supposed to be preventing it.

Why blaming only chennai police? Police is corrupted everywhere. Remember the episode of Ananra gupta? She has said that the police has misused their rights and badly illtreated her mother and her in the custody.

well i totally agreee....once one of my cousin was travelling alone and was harresed by a guy in a local bus...when she raised her voice some oldie uncle ask,ed her to sit quietly..which agitated her even more...but could she help it NO....what do u think, she could do..finally ,all she did was got up and sat next to an aunty but will she ever forget it no...and i think besides that dude that uncle was to be blamed even more..

I'm surprised that no one has paid attention to the recent raids on clubs and pubs in chennai city. In the most recent one, nearly 30 young girls were arrested without being charged of any wrong-doing. All the girls were from affluent families, were well-dressed, and were partying with the permission of their parents. This was a week or so ago, at the popular Sparks pub, where even DJ Nikhil was performing that night. Seems like the police mistreated these young girls, and warned them that their names were blacklisted now, and they would not be spared if they were caught in a club again. After one in the night, their parents were called to the police station and asked silly questions like whether they knew if their daughters were out partying, if they knew who they had gone with and what time they'd come back home. When all the parents replied in the affirmative and questioned the police officers' right to detain their daughters', they were given a lecture on how they should not allow young girls to go to these kind of parties at night.

Some interesting facts to note - All the girls who were arrested were over the age of 18, and one of them was also a married woman of 35 with two children. These girls were all from affluent families, and were picked out at random from the crowd based on the way they were dressed. They were verbally abused, and there are also reports about physical abuse. They were all too scared to talk openly to the press about their experience. The club manager was also slapped and physically abused by the police when he tried to question their authority and stop them from arresting these girls baselessly.

Being a resident of Chennai myself, when I read a report on this in an issue of The Deccan Chronicle the next day, I was shocked, furious, and ashamed of belonging to a city like this where there is this kind of "Police Raj". Where sexual harrasment of girls is so blatant, and that too by the very people who are supposed to be preventing it. Where people don't have the courage to raise their voices in the court of law against this kind of injustice, where only a single newspaper in the entire state dared to report the incident fully and completely.

I think the first thing that comes to the mind of 80% of the population on reading about an incident like this, without the last few lines, of course, is that "Whoa, shameless girl, airing her private affairs like that in public. She must've done something to provoke the poor guy. Maybe she was dressed indecently and he couldn't help himself. Girls these days expose too much."

This is why the reverse reaction - because company officials are not allowed to think this way whenever a female employee comes to them with a complaint of sexual harassment. That they take this to the other extreme is unfortunate. One can only hope that maybe in a few years people will treat each other more like equals, only then will any kind of real justice be assured.

Sexual Harassment at workplace


No Sir, I am telling you Sir, I have done nothing Vinod pleaded.
But, Swati is saying you did made a sexual advance on her said Gautam, Managing Director of the company.

Seated in a swanky personal office of the Managing Director, Mr. Gautam, was trying to handle an uncommon situation in the office. Swati, his person secretary, has accused Vinod, the Marketing Manager, of sexual harassment.

I dont know why she is saying it. Believe me I havent done anything to her.
Vinod, are you aware that this is a punishable offence?
But Sir, I swear to God, I have not done anything to her.
Now you better explain to me why would she lie if you say that you havent done anything?
But Sir, I am telling you the truth.
You mean she isnt telling the truth?
I dont know Sir.
Vinod, you are only making this difficult for yourself.

Slightly bald Gautam in his plain white shirt wearing an expensive lustrous tie got from his oversized pitch black velvety leather chair and goes to the large exquisite wooden cupboard and takes out a red coloured file with a name Company Policy.

He flips through the thick pages of the file and articulates, Now listen up Vinod, here in our company policy it is categorically stated that whoever is accused of a wrongful conduct such a sexual harassment shall thereupon be terminated from the employment.

Vinod gravely replied, But Sir, it has only used the word accused. And I believe the allegation of wrongful conduct upon me hasnt been proved yet.

Swati quickly said, Fine, if you dont believe then ask Mohan, our peon, who was present at that moment.

Mohan, short, skinny youngster came in and was asked about the incident.

Sir, only Vinod and Swati were present there in the pantry. When I entered, Swati screamed saying, Dont touch me and scrammed.

Vinod vehemently interrupted, Thats it. He didnt see anything. He only heard what Swati yelled.

Swati retorted, But it also doesnt prove that you didnt do anything.

Vinod took a deep breath and said, Fine, let me explain. I was in the pantry to have a cup of tea and behind me I saw Swati. I didnt bother to see what she was doing. After a while, just before Mohan entered, she suddenly screamed. And that is what all happened.

Vinod, can you prove you are innocent asked Gautam slowly.

Why should I prove that I am innocent? She should prove her allegations first.

Swati gloomily said, Sir, if you cant do justice, then I might as well leave this company. I dont want to work in a company where there is no respect for women.

Vinod looked on Swati with disbelief. He was unable to figure out the reason behind her allegations and behaviour. He was beginning to lose his temper.

Gautam meekly said, Swati, you dont have to leave the company. You will get justice, I promise. Could you please leave us alone, I will speak to Vinod in private.

Swati sadly looking down and got up from the chair and innocently strode out of the office.

She could hear Gautam yelling on Vinod but was not clearly audible to know what he was saying.

Anju, Swatis colleague and a close friend, came over and asked about the chaos.

Gautam Sir is yelling at Vinod for sexually harassing me Swati curtly replied.

Oh my God, Vinod tried to sexually harass you? shocked and amazed, Anju asked with a low voice.

Swati looked around if anybody is watching her and came close to Anjus ear and muttered, No, I am lying.



(PS: Is our mind so narrow and incapable of thinking of the possibilities?)

I agree completely with you. parents should always encourage communication of everything good or bad from the child and guide them accordingly.
A few decades ago we used to tell a girl child "beware of strangers" but now I prefer say "beware of relatives and acquaintances" as they have more harming potential.


Yes, I know that we are living in a civilised society. But ....................

ekkdumm sahi bole aap.
I know this is a practice with many officers in the army.the dad is working and so is the mom. Young children are molested.
So kids are told very clearly by their parents at a very early age itself-DONT LET ANYONE TOUCH U IF U DONT LIKE IT.
that is the only solution.

And bhai Calculus, whats this thing about warning ''girl child''.
Zamana bada kharaab hai.applies to all kids.

@Digital Saint........

That's the thing. But unfortunately, many people are not like that and tend to take advantage of females like that. No wonder, they dont even trust the good guys.


anyway, any initiative can come only when we try individually and contribute on our part.

Dude

Totally agree with ya, and kudos to ppl who are up against the menace man!! Besides starting off blogs/encouraging them we also need to change the society,s attitude/outlook towerds women. While this may seem outdated but man, look out its happening everywhere even educated men/women have a biased attitude towards sexual harassment.

Widout such a significant change, no blogs can do anything.

Something sweet and innocent, for a change.

Maybe the world isn't half as bad as we think it is. Maybe the world was not always such a bad place as we imagine it is now. Maybe we, as young boys and girls, can atleast try to learn how to treat each other as equals.

I came across a very well written article... called the other side of blank noise

The author can be contacted here.. http://www.vulturo.com/2006/03/the-other-side-of-blank-noise/

A good read, indeed. Most of it is so real. There are incidents which make you feel "Am I that bad?" In the same article, that guy also talked about the 'looks'. If you got decent looks and wear decent enough clothes, the chances that the girl will give you 'Tumhare ghar me maa behen nahi hai' look are miniscule. We(guys as well as the girls) have been programmed to assume a lot from the outer appearance of the other person.

Last month I was travelling from Delhi ISBT to my hometown. It was about 8 am. I generally sit on the 2-seater side of the bus. A girl boarded from the by-pass and even when there were a number of fully vacant seats, for whatever reason, she sat along with me. It was a long journey spanning 7-8 hours. She slept half the way on my shoulder.

When she got up, she asked me what place it was. Then after a while she asked where I was going and blah blah. It was all so slow. I sheepishly said "How comfortable was my shoulder?" She was stunned; just blushed and said sorry and all. Then she told me she worked in a BPO and had night shift, so she was sleepy coz of that. Then we started discussing the usual things of life. To cut it short, it was a fine journey and we became friends. So, a lot depends on what you make out of it.

There are incidents when people give you strange looks but hey that's how the world is!

I came across a very well written article... called the other side of blank noise

A very well written and nice post... I would not like to disclose the secret of what it is about, but suggest that u go through it.. :)

Slightly lengthy, yet a good one!

The author can be contacted here.. http://www.vulturo.com/2006/03/the-other-side-of-blank-noise/

Adios!

Hmmm..A very well written article...however,a note for the writer;not only women but also men(mostly after hitting puberty) can feel the difference between a 'deliberate touch' and a casual touch...so its not about being stuck in an overcrowded bus with to quote the writer'crotches' and'shoulders' rubbing against one's body,its termed as'sexual harassment' when its'deliberate'...

Hi all,

I have visited ur thread for the first time and would like to share one of my friend's bitter experience.I'm not sure whether i should post something personal about her but i think this is necessary to create awarenaess.

My friend use to go for a coaching classes,& there the proffesor who use to teach them, got attracted towards her.He tried to woo her but when she didn't responded, he became irritated. He demotivated her, humiliated her, didn't supported her in her studies & mentally harrased her in many other ways. She didn't even talked to her parents about it because they have a habbit of critisizing her whenever something wrong happens with her.This whole episode put a very bad effect on her and she got an year back in her exams.

Due to her year back there are very less chances to her of getting into a good college after graduation.Her future has been spoiled due to a man's so called love and ego

Sexual harassement in the society has taken such a marathon form, that it has even contaminated the sacred relationship of teacher and student.

A bitter reality of life........


Man cleared of rape charge after 20 yrs
NEW YORK: His freedom secured more than two decades after he was imprisoned for a rape he did not commit, Alan Newton described his plans: a home-cooked meal, a visit to the gave of his mother, who died about 10 years ago.

But Newton also offered his sympathy to the woman whose rape led to his wrongful conviction and time in prison until he was freed on Thursday after being cleared by DNA evidence.

"My unjust conviction denied both of us justice," he said outside a Bronx Criminal Court, where a judge earlier signed the order declaring him a free man.

The non-profit Innocence Project and prosecutors from the Bronx district attorney's office had asked for Newton's 1985 conviction to be vacated based on recent testing on a rape kit used for the woman after the incident.

Newton, now 44, was convicted of raping the woman in an abandoned Bronx building in June 1984. He was sentenced in 1985 to up to 40 years in prison.

In 1994, he filed a motion asking that new DNA testing be conducted, but the request was denied because the evidence was unavailable, the Innocence Project and prosecutors wrote in papers filed to the court.

At the request of the Innocence Project, the district attorney's office last year asked the New York Police Department's property clerk division to search for the rape kit at an evidence warehouse in Queens.

Despite what Innocence Project lawyers and prosecutors said were earlier claims that it was lost or had been destroyed, officials found the kit, which was tested for DNA by two labs earlier this year. The tests cleared Newton.

Newton said he wanted to complete his bachelor degree and search out career options. He was a bank teller at the time of his arrest.

This is not a case of only lust, it is rather a mental case added to frustration of some sort.

Still . . . . hmmmm

UNTHINKABLE.

yeah! whenever i think of it... i just feel as though i will go sick.... this is one of the most gruesome incident i have come across.... Maybe the punishment of such demons should be that they should be skinned alive!

I read this article and after reading it, i felt as though i would go sick... :bad-word:

80-year-old woman raped, murdered in Noida
An 80-year-old woman was raped and murdered on Sunday by one of her neighbours here (noida), an area adjoining the national capital, police said.

The woman was sleeping when Manbir, a labourer, entered her house and assaulted her, police said. "The family members of the woman were sleeping on the terrace while she was alone in the house," said Soumitra Yadav, superintendent of police, Noida.

Yadav added that Manbir was arrested soon after the family members found the woman dead in the morning and he had confessed to the crime.

He added that Manbir had strangled the woman to death. The body has been sent for post-mortem.



Just too aghast to comment anything!!

This is not a case of only lust, it is rather a mental case added to frustration of some sort.

Still . . . . hmmmm

UNTHINKABLE.

I read this article and after reading it, i felt as though i would go sick... :bad-word:

80-year-old woman raped, murdered in Noida
An 80-year-old woman was raped and murdered on Sunday by one of her neighbours here (noida), an area adjoining the national capital, police said.

The woman was sleeping when Manbir, a labourer, entered her house and assaulted her, police said. "The family members of the woman were sleeping on the terrace while she was alone in the house," said Soumitra Yadav, superintendent of police, Noida.

Yadav added that Manbir was arrested soon after the family members found the woman dead in the morning and he had confessed to the crime.

He added that Manbir had strangled the woman to death. The body has been sent for post-mortem.



Just too aghast to comment anything!!

Sorry for the late reply, been a little busy with other things.

I would like to thank you, however, for telling us about something that no one else wants to talk about. How children are being molested all the time when their parents don't have enough time or patience to take care of them. Somehow, even I don't think I'd be able to give my kids my attention 24x7, and neither will most other people reading this thread. Does that mean I ignore this horrible possibility, and just carry on with my work like I've nothing to worry about?

Just a thought.

I do, however, have one word of encouragement for your friend. Tell her, if you can, never to be afraid of anyone. And never to be ashamed of what happened to her. Tell her to hate those who did this to her, for there is no forgiving those who steal a child's innocence. Tell her to move on, so that she can help those in ways that she needed help herself. Tell her to be happy that she is alive today to tell this tale, that she is safe with her loved ones, unlike so many other children who are molested and sold into prostitution.

Most importantly, tell her to move on. Just as we all move on, and move away from those who abuse us, if ever.

I agree completely with you. parents should always encourage communication of everything good or bad from the child and guide them accordingly.
A few decades ago we used to tell a girl child "beware of strangers" but now I prefer say "beware of relatives and acquaintances" as they have more harming potential.

I would have liked the girl child molesters being stonned to death.

Yes, I know that we are living in a civilised society. But ....................