Got through? Good. Now what?

[Intangible]

maddy,
ur attitude is awesome and hat's off to u for that.....

i too have thought long and hard abt these questions , but never found a concrete answer.........maybe an answer doesn't exist at all...maybe this is the purpose of life...to try and find an answer to these questions........maybe that's why when we were kids we used to read poems that said 'childhood was the best phase in one's life"....

am i getting pessimistic or emotional!!!....well, these are my thoughts on the subject and i think each individual has to fix his/her preferences...and then follow them......

if u want to earn a lot of money, go places etc...then most probably corporate work (esp serving for someone) is not for u....for such a life a govt job esp IFS is the thing........or else start something on ur own....u 'll have to slog a lot initially but then after u have established something u can take it easy......

also, whether u want peace in life or not, an IIM education will never hurt...in fact it wil open up ur eyes to a lot of things so go for it...

Another thing, IIMC ppl were just trying to stress u out....whether u get selected there or not, remember not to take any comment in an interview seriously......most probably they were exaggerating things to stress u out....personally those might not be their views.....

bol

[teenagedirtbag]

Thanks to maddy and Arun.
U cleared up a lot of doubts of mine.
I am also in a bit of delimma.My father here is a very succesful businessman here in my home city.Now that i have got calls from some of the best B-schools in the country and have seen how the corporate world works(Moi an IT pro.)i am really in a bit of dellima weither i should join an MNC after my MBA and slog for 105 hrs a week just to prove that i can achive something in life without anyones help(individuality issues and stuffs) or join my dad's business,having difficult time explaining to my family why i slogged for so many years in studies just for that,but having a peaceful and laidback life.

[catbert]

Dear Friends, I finished my engineering last year and decided to take a year off to get into a good B-school. I messed up a bit on D-day (CAT) but managed to secure calls from Calcutta and Lucknow. After spending a whole year pursuing an MBA, I got an admit to MDI. This was even b4 the IIM interviews. I should have been very happy and I was. But...... its not quite natural for me to sit back and be happy. The admits meant I was doing an MBA for sure. Or was I?/>>>

Like I said I was not someone who would sit back and relax, and as they say an idle mind is the devil's workshop. Idle I was and I began to brood. A week before I got the call from MDI I was sure of why I wanted to do an MBA. I could convince anyone I came across as to why I wanted an MBA and more importantly I could convince myself. But just in a week I was suddenly not all that sure anymore.>>

Was I doing an MBA just because I had no better options? Or was I doing it because I thought this is exactly what I wanted? I had an year to think about this. And all year long after giving the matter all due respect, I knew that this is what I wanted. But now, all of a sudden, for the first time I was not all that sure. Why am I thinking this way, I asked myself? >>

Is it because I am apprehensive of what lies in store for me? After all this is going to be a new experience. If that is the case it is quite okay, I thought. After all it is quite natural to be a little apprehensive when some change is taking place in your life. You are just excited about it I told myself. But then I pondered, what if that's not it?>>

Then the same thoughts that some of you might be thinking about were to haunt the living daylights out of me. Do I want to make this commitment? After all this is post-grad we are talking about. You should do it if you know this is what you want. This is not about the next two years its about the next forty! After all this is the field you would probably work in for the rest of your career. Although an MBA can actually provide access to a wide range of career options- and this one of the prime attractions of this course for me- think of the things I will not be able to do because of choosing this way. Like some of you have pointed out a lot of times, is this going to set us free or is it going to pull us further into a net? It kind of reminded me of Jimmy Shergill from MunnaBhai MBBS. "Let me work now, aur fir jeeoonga kissi din", he said. We will be tangled in a net of working 24/7 in the hopes of making our lives better someday and all this while letting go of some of the best times in our lives. Or will we?>>

Then I pondered again! I know that you must be growing tired of my thoughts by now, but since you are still reading I might as well take you further down the hell-hole of my thoughts and try and show you what my present state of mind is. Like I said will we? Will we be all entangled in the web we so try to free ourselves from? After all what is this web? It is the desire to make money, lots of it, to gain a position of power, to have a great job, to......>>

Is all this is leading somewhere? We want to make the best of our lives. And its not bad at all to be working 24/7 for it. In fact it's the only thing worth working for. By slogging it out at a b-school and after passing out, if we are the better for it, it is all worth our efforts. The key then I thought is about working to improve ourselves, everyday and every moment, sort of like Kaizen.>>

Its like the Bhagvada Gita: Work, and don't worry about the reward. If we live in the 'work now for our better lives tomorrow' syndrome, we are committing crimes against ourselves. I can't help but feel I drift away here. But I learn a lot as I write. This constant state of confusion might be the answer. For after all, if you are sure of what you want you might think that the aim of life is to get to your destination and not about the journey there. What a mistake that would be! Only by asking yourself over and over, by questioning yourself, can you make the best of the journey. We will be no more in the trap by doing an MBA than we were before doing it. Just make sure you know what your priorities are and you will be happy, MBA or no MBA.>>

I provide no answers, I know. But again there are a lot of questions that someone who is confused would have. And it is asking questions, which is of prime importance. That is the only reality check we have. We will not find answers in a day or for that matter in a year- as I have found out. But if we do find the answers in our lifetime, our lives should be worthwhile.>>

>>

>>

>>

P.S.: I think this post is way to heavy. I should be cynical of it had I not written it. Just the state of mind, that's all.>>

>>

>>

[maddy420]

great post ..Catbert!!!

It is a sort of thinking one does when he is on a train journey,on terrace,alone boozing etc..It is abt pondering over our existence..our lives, how we were,wht we r now,our aspirations etc..
Indore results are out and I m out..No converts.Blame the IIMs??no way..I wud accept tht I m the reason for all these rejections..Feel guilty??No..Happy tht I m going thru these experiences.We live once..I dont know wht happened b4 my birth and wht will happen after my death..so we shud live not just exist..but this is a personal feeling.
I may feel happy going to a 9-5 job but my friend may love a 15 hr job.I wud like to spend time with pets while my friend whiles away with his sms...Does this means tht I m spending quality time while my friend doesnt..no ..from his dimension he is enjoying his time..

We will be tangled in a net of working 24/7 in the hopes of making our lives better someday and all this while letting go of some of the best times in our lives. Or will we?

True true...I Remember a short story where a middle class father:a lawyer aspiring to make his family happy..He wud be sitting hours on the desk..after some 10 yrs Looking back at his family..all wud have deserted him..Reason is "he doesnt care for us"..
this is toooo pessimistic but we shud realise tht we shud not fall into such a trap making our life miserable..

Just a small calculation...I saw a post of an ISB grad with 180,000$ salary..If he manages to save 30k to 40k$ in a year..tht amt to 0.5million$ in 10 years..but he wud be millionaire by savings alone considering the perks,appraisals etc..Considering the savings like stocks etc..which wud be a multiplier effect..makes me go dizzy..by 35 yrs of age..he will be having kids of 5-7 yrs..He can quit the bussyy life and retire to less paced work and more family life..looks nice unless U can jumpout of the 'I want more' frame and bag the zero day placements(of course a herculean task)

As for me ..with IIMs and MDI closing the doors,I shud be packing my bags to infosys..come this september(wud love to stay in Mysore winter palace but infosys promises a better place).
I had quit competitive bodybuilding for personal reasons(but still storming the gym ..all the same except tht I wont be competing for Titles),saw my ex-Gf recently(glancing eyes..but a superb thing happened.b4 she cud start showing off ..I had my T shirt say the Lines..T shirt had "RESTRICTED" on it..I lov such timings..Feel pity for such gals who get blasted..time to start searching for a nice GF)
I will going on a trip to the forests(TN-AP) accompanied by some rangers.with my friends(a 15-18 big gang) in the month of May..time for action
I have not planned much..but will be spending the next 5 months in a fine way.

[fragileninja]

Originally Posted by catbert

Dear Friends, I finished my engineering last year and decided to take a year off to get into a good B-school. I messed up a bit on D-day (CAT) but managed to secure calls from Calcutta and Lucknow. After spending a whole year pursuing an MBA, I got an admit to MDI. This was even b4 the IIM interviews. I should have been very happy and I was. But...... its not quite natural for me to sit back and be happy. The admits meant I was doing an MBA for sure. Or was I?/>>>

.....

P.S.: I think this post is way to heavy. I should be cynical of it had I not written it. Just the state of mind, that's all.>>


>>

Gr8 post... Have been into 2 minds myself... But there r a lot more reasons for my confusion! Still, nice to know that thr r some more people out there thinking from the heart!!!

[Angus]

Originally Posted by catbert

Dear Friends, I finished my engineering last year ...
>>

These are questions which everyone must ponder over, every now and then. They are your milestones.We have to look up and see where we r and where we r headed
(otherwise we wuld be just rats looking for openings).
Happiness is always a by product of something, not a goal in itself.
You may define the goal to be money (though its rationale seems to fade soner or later cause pure hard cash is just a stat), you may want power ( but, again the charm of instructing ppl for the sheer pleasure of it fades after a pt. of time, believe me on that) or it could be fame(but fame in itself is widely known to be just a breach of privacy and undue media attraction)
One would surely go for all these things and many more, but for satisfaction and contentment there is the need for something more, a solid reason why u want them.
If you have that reason these things will always follow, u dont have to chase them. You have to have the believe in that reason.
Its gr8 to have these things, but they are also b products of another dream, they are not the dream themselves, nobody is wanted just for his fame,is he. he is wanted cause he did something gr8 that made him famous.
After the fame, power etc. one could tap them as one may ,to pursue one's bigger dreams and the cycle continues....In my opinion its as simple as that
I have taken the forum to a diff. dimension, but had to flow with the thought....

[flber]

experiences.. thts all it is

these days when thr is so much of emphasis, call it peer-pressure or a loss of vision, on a limited few metrics , only if u experience a need for quality time away from work, with your loved ones, pursuing your passion or somethin you always wanted to do, will your craving for a high-flyin job or need to join the top school to get tht job would come down to more appropriate levels, whr it ideally should have been in the first place. If the idea of making it into the top school is not thought of as much as it is by most ppl and marked as a life/death situation, consider yourslef lucky

Its so easy again to quote such a statement cos most of us are unsure of what we want and many times under the wrong impression of what we want. And even if we are sure , needs and expectations keep changin, sometimes over time n sometimes as a flash.

So no matter how confident you are about your focus and vision , its always good to have a thought in the back of your mind... "thr is always scope for change and always unforseen needs". Once this is understood , one can just go for his/her goals without guilt, cos you know change in needs and goals is possible,n tht pursuing your idea of happiness is more imp. .Once a person is focussed yet not rigid(easy to u`stand,diff. to realise) , its so much easier cos then you have the liberty to switch from a hectic life to a more laidback life and vice-versa as n when you feel the need for either.

Bottom line , no matter what decision you take , dont feel guilty in future , if you are sure tht for the CURRENT situation it is the best. Of coure with hindsight anyone could`ve been GOD , but thankfully we are humans and we can experience unpredictablity.

flber

p.s : i started to pen down a post , turned out i actually wanted to communicate abt something.

[sunny_kris]

First of all...Arun, that was simply a superb post, and a great pointer to "live life to the fullest"... but ofcourse, u can only lead the horse to the pond and pray that it is wise enough to understand the beauty of the offer.


My two cents for all the junta.....catbert, maddy....and the numerous others who are afraid to come out of the shadows..please don't be a victim of peer pressure. Most ppl out there are like sheep...following what someone else has done. Sacrificing originality for the sake of a low risk option.

I'm in the s/w industry too....in a very reputed MNC with lots of ppl working late into the nights. they scorn "cowboys" like me who leave office at 6-6:30...but i never stayed late, unless it is really necessary. (i'm one of the top performers in my project, and have been felicitated with awards for my work.Not a work shunner by any means)
Why take crap from someone else? why should you let somoneelse decide how to spend your weekend? what good is that extra 1k, if you don't have the time to spend it proprly??
There is a lot of peer pressure in the s/w industry, if u don't do the job, there are 3 other lifeless drones ready to lap it up.....that would alwayz be the case, given the rate at which IT companies are recruiting nowadays.

Be stern, prioritise. Don't blame the system, blame urself for the mistakes happening to u. take responsibilty.I don't mean to sound rude, but it is just out of my personal experience that i say so.brickbats are alwayz welcome.

The article below is a nice read....hope it helps u clear some clouds in your head.

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True Work
" I once had a professor who dreamed of being a concert pianist. Fearing the possibility of failure, he went into academics where the work was secure and the money predictable. One day, when I was talking to him about my graduate studies, he walk over and sat down at his piano.
He played a beautiful glissando and then, abruptly stopped. "Do what is in your heart," he said " I really wanted to be a concert pianist. Now I spent everyday wondering how good I might have been"
Finding your work is not always easy. No matter how much you might believe that your work is nothing more than what you do to make money, your work makes you who you are, because it is where you put your time.

Look carefully at the superficial attractions of a job, and consider what it will require you to do, day to day, hour to hour, minute to minute. See if that is how you want to spend your time. If it is not, your work will become your prison rather than the vehicle of your dreams. And a person without dreams is only half alive. No amount of security, money is worth the suffering of a life lived chained to a routine that has killed your dreams.
Find what it is that burns in your heart, and do it. Your life will have meaning, and your days will have peace. Follow your HEART. LIVE IN TRUTH "
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cheers,
Sunil

[devvrat]

preparing for theGD's and intrs one of the toughest qs. that freaks mopst ppl oiut is
y u wanna do an mba?
one of the worse stress qs.. ppl prefer comparing similarities between blackhole physics and quantum theory rather than face this dreaded qs. Intrw preps in coachin instis start with prep students y they want to do a mba.

if after prepraring one year for cat and putting in the effort to crack one of the toughest (competition wise) exams one still has no clue as to what and why then there is clearly somerthing amiss.

i had the same introspection phase and subconscious strengthening into preconscious forcing questions on the conscious on the same issue . ( read signature below) . In my family both my father and my sister's a mba( from iimb) so there was an added effect of proving myself. ( but do i really need to.... and after having made it to 4 iim's have i really proved anything ).

i think what's impo is that we realy have to find our true calling. a mba will be just means to an end. so wll th money we earn. there are ppl who dream to be in ibanks, consultancies etc and not for the money.. they enjoy what they do and get a kick out of everyday work. as the qoute goes

"take up a job u love and u won't have to work a single day in ur life"

the fact that u are havin second thoughts about ur choice or u dread imagining urself workin 24/7 (y d impression that u'll have to have to work so long) and screwing up ur life means u need to introspect what u really wanna do. its easy to know what u don't wanna do.. but tougher to say what u wanna. i know this guy who gets all excited with the finance fundas, finds the lowest of mgmnt gyaan more intr than the highest tech funda nad dreams of stock mrkts, banks etc. he is cut out for slogging ( from my pov.. he wud luv it) in an ibank. don't live someone else's dream.. go off to sleep and find ur own.

orignally by maddy..
If the answer is NO..Is it the same NO if I decide to stay in US,canda or new zealand..?24/7 job..earn money and have a blank life!!?Is it wat the whole new generation's lifestyle is?Am I stuck up in the past?Wud I be still able to continue my interests..Will IIM help to get me out of this 'stuck up in a rut' or will it push me further into it...?IS it possible to settle for the real life and follow our dreams by 30 or so by working harder now?

just a wild eg.. but u could probab open ur own fitness centres or provide health/fitness mgmnt to ppl. that thing requires a great deal of mgmnt applicaion.. backed by good domain knowledge u could have a huge chain of fitness/training/health centres... thinking big! but quite possible coz u have huge paasion to back it.
what if u fail.. sounds too tough or big.. does it really matter coz i enjoyed the journey (obviously talkin above a certain fin security)

nice post by sunil.. don't give in to peer pressure.. do ur own thing. dont live someone else's dream.

Look carefully at the superficial attractions of a job, and consider what it will require you to do, day to day, hour to hour, minute to minute. See if that is how you want to spend your time. If it is not, your work will become your prison rather than the vehicle of your dreams. And a person without dreams is only half alive. No amount of security, money is worth the suffering of a life lived chained to a routine that has killed your dreams.
Find what it is that burns in your heart, and do it. Your life will have meaning, and your days will have peace. Follow your HEART. LIVE IN TRUTH "

[maddy420]

what good is that extra 1k, if you don't have the time to spend it proprly??
There is a lot of peer pressure in the s/w industry, if u don't do the job, there are 3 other lifeless drones ready to lap it up.....that would alwayz be the case, given the rate at which IT companies are recruiting nowadays.
----------------sunny_kris

what if u fail.. sounds too tough or big.. does it really matter coz i enjoyed the journey (obviously talkin above a certain fin security)
---------------devvrat

...Lines for thought..Sorry to make a one line post. I shud ponder over these b4 making a good post.keep the posts flowing in..thnks to the PGs who r trying to help the confused minds here