prince_andhra

@prince_andhra

prince_andhra
@prince_andhra
Posted 21 Jun '06
Has anyone got the link for 'tintin in tibet' .. i need it badly ...!! thnx in advance.:neutral:
Has anyone got the link for 'tintin in tibet' .. i need it badly ...!! thnx in advance.:neutral:
prince_andhra
@prince_andhra
Posted 19 Jun '05
A single guy decides life would be more fun if he had a pet. He went to the pet store and told the owner that he wanted to buy an unusual pet. After some discussion, he finally bought a centipede (100-legged bug), which came in a little white box to use for its house. He took the b...
A single guy decides life would be more fun if he had a pet. He went to
the pet store and told the owner that he wanted to buy an unusual pet.

After some discussion, he finally bought a centipede (100-legged bug), which came in a little white box to use for its house.

He took the box back home, found a good location for the box, and decided he would start off by taking his new pet to church with him.

He asked the centipede in the box, "Would you like to go to church with me today? We will have a good time." But there was no answer from his new pet.

This bothered him a bit, so he waited a few minutes and then asked him again, "How about going to church with me and receive blessings?"

But again, there was no answer from his new friend and pet. He waited a few minutes more, thinking about the situation.

He decided to ask him one more time. This time putting his face up
against the centipede's house and shouting, "Hey, in there! Would you
like to go to church with me and learn about the Lord?"

>A little teeny voice came out of the box... "I heard you the firsttime! I'm putting on my shoes."

prince_andhra
@prince_andhra
Posted 19 Jun '05
No Offence meant to women... Why Men Are Just Happier People - What do you expect from such simple creatures? The garage is all yours. Chocolate is just another snack. You can be president. You can never be pregnant. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. ...
No Offence meant to women...

Why Men Are Just Happier People - What do you expect from such simple creatures?


The garage is all yours.

Chocolate is just another snack.

You can be president.

You can never be pregnant.

You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.

You can wear NO T-shirt to a water park.

Car mechanics tell you the truth.

You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.

Same work, more pay.

Wrinkles add character.

People never stare at your chest when you're talking
to them.

The occasional well-rendered belch is practically
expected.

New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.

One mood -- all the time.

Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.

A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.

You can open all your own jars.

You get extra credit for the slightest act of
thoughtfulness.

Your underwear is Rs.99 for three-pack.

Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.

You almost never have strap problems in public.

You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.

Everything on your face stays its original color.

The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.

You only have to shave your face and neck.

You can play with toys all your life.

Your belly usually hides your big hips.

One wallet and one pair of shoes one color for all
seasons.

You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.

You can "do" your nails with a pocketknife.

You have freedom of choice concerning growing a
mustache.

You can do festive shopping for 25 relatives in 25
minutes.

No wonder men are happier!
prince_andhra
@prince_andhra
Posted 19 Jun '05
Sardar proposed a Girl......Girl said 'I'm 1yr elder to you'...........Sardar said 'Oye No Problem Soniye,I'll marry you NEXT YEAR. \-------------------------------------------------------- A Sardar & his wife filed an application 4 Divorce. Judge asked: How'll U divide, U"VE 3 ch...
Sardar proposed a Girl......Girl said 'I'm 1yr elder to
you'...........Sardar
said 'Oye No Problem Soniye,I'll marry you NEXT YEAR.

--------------------------------------------------------

A Sardar & his wife filed an application 4 Divorce. Judge asked: How'll
U divide, U"VE 3 children? Sardar replied: Ok! We"ll apply NEXT YEAR

--------------------------------------------------------

Sardar's wish :when i die,i wana die lik my grandpa who died peacefuly
in his sleep not screamin like all d passengers in d car he was
driving..

--------------------------------------------------------

Sardar at an Art Gallery: I suppose this horrible looking thing is what
you call modern art ?
Art dealer: I beg your pardon sir, thats a mirror!

--------------------------------------------------------

Sardar was writing something very slowly.
Friend asked:" Why r u writing so slowly?
Sardar: "I'm writing 2 my 6 yr old son, he can't read very fast.

--------------------------------------------------------

Flash news: A 2 seater plane crashed in a graveyard in punjab . Local
sardars have so far found 500 bodies and are still digging for more..

--------------------------------------------------------

A man asked sardarji, why Manmohan singh goes walking at evening not in
the morning. Sardarji replied ''Arey bhai Manmohan is PM not AM''.

--------------------------------------------------------

Sardar visits Chinese friend dying in hospital.
Man says CHIN YU YAN n dies.
Srdr goes2 china 2 find meaning of friends last words.
It is 'U R STANDNG ON D OXGN TUBE!"
prince_andhra
@prince_andhra
Posted 19 Jun '05
Srdr: I hav'nt slept all nite in the train. Frnd: Y? Srdr: Got upper berth. Frnd: Y did'nt u Xchnged? Srdr: oye, there was nobody 2 Xchng in the lower berth.. \-------------------------------------------------------- Sardar tells a girl "Come 2 my house at nite, nobody will b th...
Srdr: I hav'nt slept all nite in the train. Frnd: Y?
Srdr: Got upper berth.
Frnd: Y did'nt u Xchnged?
Srdr: oye, there was nobody 2 Xchng in the lower berth..

--------------------------------------------------------

Sardar tells a girl "Come 2 my house at nite, nobody will b
there............. Girl goes at night & realy nobody was there

--------------------------------------------------------

A Teacher lecturing on population - In India after Every 10 sec a woman
gives birth to a kid.
A Sardar stands up- we must find & stop her!.

-------------------------------------------------------

Sardar-why r all these people running?
Man- This is a race, the winner will get the cup.
Sardar-If only the winner will get the cup, why r others running?

--------------------------------------------------------

Teacher: "I killed a person" convert this sentence into future tense.
Sardar: The future tense is "u will go to jail".

--------------------------------------------------------

Srdr gets ready ,wears tie, coat ,goes out, climbs tree, sits on the
branch
regularly. A man asks why he does this. Srdr:"I've been promoted as
branch
manager."

--------------------------------------------------------

Sardarji was filling up application form for a job. He was not sure
as to what to be filled in column "Salary Expected".
After much thought he wrote : Yes!

--------------------------------------------------------

One sardarji professor asked a plumber to come to his college.
U knw Why?
Because he wanted to check where the question paper is leaking...

-------------------------------------------------------

Sardar told his servant: Go and water the plants. Servant: It"s
already raining. Sardar: So what take an umbrella and go.

--------------------------------------------------------

Sardar found the answer to the most difficult question ever -
What will come first, Chicken or egg?
O Yaar, what ever u order first will come first.

--------------------------------------------------------

Sardar wins 20 cr from Rs. 20 lottery ticket. Dealer gave 11 cr after
deducting tax. Angry Sardar: "Give me 20 cr or else return my
20 Rs back.!

--------------------------------------------------------

Postman:- I Have To Come 5 Miles To Deliver U This Packet
Sardar:- why did u come so far. Instead u could have posted
it....

--------------------------------------------------------
prince_andhra
@prince_andhra
Posted 15 Jun '05
A man is flying in a hot air balloon and realizes he is lost. He reduces height and spots a man down below. He lowers the balloon further and shouts, 'Excuse me, can you help me? I promised my friend I would meet him half an hour ago, but I don't know where I am.' The man below says, 'Yes. ...
A man is flying in a hot air balloon and realizes he is lost. He reduces height and spots a man down below. He lowers the balloon further and shouts, 'Excuse me, can you help me? I promised my friend I would meet him half an hour ago, but I don't know where I am.'

The man below says, 'Yes. You are in a hot air balloon, hovering approximately 30 feet above this field. You are between 40 and 42 degrees North latitude, and between 58 and 60 degrees West longitude.'

'You must be a programmer,' says the balloonist.

'I am,' replies the man. 'How did you know?'

'Well,' says the balloonist, 'everything you have told me is technically correct, but I have no idea what to make of your information,and the fact is I am still lost.'

The man below says, 'You must be a project manager 'I am,' replies the balloonist, 'but how did you know?'

'Well,' says the man, 'you don't know where you are, or where you are going. You have made a promise which you have no idea how to keep, and you expect me to solve your problem. The fact is you are in the exact same position you were in before we met, but now it is somehow my fault.'
prince_andhra
@prince_andhra
Posted 15 Jun '05
A young woman teacher with obvious liberal tendencies explains to her class of small children that she is an atheist. She asks her class if they are atheists too. Not really knowing what atheism is but wanting to be like their teacher, their hands explode into the air like fleshy fireworks. The...
A young woman teacher with obvious liberal tendencies explains to her class of small children that she is an atheist. She asks her class if they are atheists too. Not really knowing what atheism is but wanting to be like their teacher, their hands explode into the air like fleshy fireworks.
There is, however, one exception. A beautiful girl named Dolly has not gone along with the crowd. The teacher asks her why she has decided to be different.
"Because I'm not an atheist."
Then, asks the teacher, "What are you?"
"I'm a Christian."
The teacher is a little perturbed now, her face slightly red. She asks Dolly why she is a Christian.
"Well, I was brought up knowing and loving Jesus. My mom is a Christian, and my dad is a Christian, so I am a Christian."
The teacher is now angry. "That's no reason," she says loudly. "What if your mom was a moron, and your dad was a moron. What would you be then?"
She paused, and smiled. "Then," says Dolly, "I'd be an atheist."
prince_andhra
@prince_andhra
Posted 15 Jun '05
Miss Jones is a kindergarten teacher and today is her birthday. As she walked into her classroom one of her students, Dollly, had brought a gift up to her desk. "Guess what it is!" said Dolly. Knowing that Dolly`s father owned a bookstore she guessed, "A Book?" "How did you know?" asked Dol...
Miss Jones is a kindergarten teacher and today is her birthday. As she walked into her classroom one of her students, Dollly, had brought a gift up to her desk.
"Guess what it is!" said Dolly.
Knowing that Dolly`s father owned a bookstore she guessed, "A Book?"
"How did you know?" asked Dolly
Next, Robert brought a gift up to Miss Smith. "Guess what it is!" said Robert.
Knowing that his parents owned a florist shop, she guessed, "Flowers?"
"How did you know ?" asked Robert

Finally, Johnny brought up a gift for Miss Smith.
"Guess what it is!" said Johnny.
Knowing that Johnny`s father owned a liquor store, and seeing that the bag was wet, she placed her fingers on the liquid and then licked them.
"Rum?" guessed Miss Smith.
"No" said Johnny.
She tasted again..."Vodka?" she guessed.
"No" said Johnny.
Once again she wet her fingers and tasted, "I know," said Miss Smith, "It`s wine."
"No!" said Johnny..."it`s a puppy."
prince_andhra
@prince_andhra
Posted 15 Jun '05
A Sunday School teacher of pre-schoolers was concerned that his students might be a little confused about Jesus Christ because of the Christmas season emphasis on His birth. He wanted to make sure they understood that the birth of Jesus occurred for real. He asked his class, "Where is Jesus today...
A Sunday School teacher of pre-schoolers was concerned that his students might be a little confused about Jesus Christ because of the Christmas season emphasis on His birth. He wanted to make sure they understood that the birth of Jesus occurred for real. He asked his class, "Where is Jesus today?"

Steven raised his hand and said, "He`s in heaven."

Mary was called on and answered, "He`s in my heart."

Little Johnny, waving his hand furiously, blurted out, "I know, I know! He`s in our bathroom!!!"

The whole class got very quiet, looked at the teacher, and waited for a response. The teacher was completely at a loss for a few very long seconds.

Finally, he gathered his wits and asked Little Johnny how he knew this.

Little Johnny said, "Well...every morning, my father gets up, bangs on the bathroom door, and yells, "Good Lord, are you still in there?!"
prince_andhra
@prince_andhra
Posted 15 Jun '05
A little boy returning home from his first day at school said to his mother, "Mum, what's sex?" His mother, who believed in all the most modern educational theories, gave him a detailed explanation, covering all aspects of the tricky subject. When she had finished, the little lad produc...
A little boy returning home from his first day at school said to his mother, "Mum, what's sex?"

His mother, who believed in all the most modern educational theories, gave him a detailed explanation, covering all aspects of the tricky subject.

When she had finished, the little lad produced an enrollment form which he had brought home from school and said, "Yes, but how am I going to get all that into this one little square?